March 23, 2024 - Used to be kikay

Just like what the title say, i used to be kikay.

When i was younger, i love kikay things. Accessories for hair, trendy clothes, cute shoes and yes, nail polishes.

But then i grew up. I don't know. Did i just lose interest or did i just, grow up?

I remember when i was in my early 20s, evertime i go home to Dagupan from Baguio (where i used to live and work), that was every month i think, i would change my nail polish colors. I must have bought all the colors available. I was obsessed. I find them cute, and it made me happy. I felt confidently pretty specially when i got to see my crush! Yiie! Landi! Haha!

But now? I don't know. Naging kampante na lang ako sa kung anong itsura ko ngayon? Wala na ako pake. Or nawalan lang ako ng gana? Wait, naging tagalog bigla?? Hehe.

I naantok na ako. Itutuloy ko pa ba 'to? Comment down below. Hahaha. May pasyente pa pala ako bukas. Este mamaya na pala dahil madaling araw na. K, bye.

March 18, 2024 - Nasa Labels ang Clue

Today's clinic was tiring! Though i had only one patient, i spent whole afternoon for just one! I'm not complaining ha 'cause all of the dental works i did today was fulfilling! I was just exhausted to the point that i forgot to list all of what i did to the patient and excluded some treatment fees! Haha!

2-unit composite veneers, 1 replacement of old composite restoration, 1 unit fiber post of a root canal treated tooth then porcelain fused to metal as her final restoration and lastly a removable partial denture for her missing teeth. All of these for just one patient! Praise the Lord for these kinds of patients! Thank you!

I like challenges. By these opportunities, i am able to learn and grow.

Okay, so while i'm busy with the patient today, i was not able to hold my phone for a while. Which is good. A short social media break. Away from toxic stressors and depressors. And what are the odds that while i'm away from facebook, heto siya, nagpaparamdam. Sino? Siya. Basta siya.

Pagod ako, pero kinikilig ako. Haha! I know, hindi ibig sabihin na kapag nagrereact siya lagi or nagcocomment sa mga posts mo, eh interesado na siya sayo. Huwag kang mafeeling gurl! Haha! Hindi ko alam kasi hindi ko naman alam kung anong intention niya at tumatakbo sa isip niya. Pero as someone na interesado sakanya, siyempre may meaning yun sa akin. Kaya nga ako kinikilig eh. One sided love eto, tangek! Hahaha!

Siguro naman napapansin din niya na panay heart ako sa mga posts niya. Kasi naman eh, medyo may mga interests siya sa buhay na medyo parehas kami. Hehe. Or feelingera lang talaga ako. Nagpapakita na nga ako ng motibo pero ayaw talaga niya mag initiate kausapin ako. Hahaha. Nagmamatigasan lang ba talaga kaming dalawa? O ako lang talaga 'tong assuming at feelingera?

Gets ko naman eh. First of all, if ever man na interesado rin siya sa akin naghehesitate pa siya kasi hindi pa siya ready, marami pa siyang sinesettle sa buhay niya. Hindi ko alam pero feeling ko yun ang dahilan. Hahaha! Feelingera nga talaga ako ano? Hahaha. Ayaw lang niya sigurong magpa-asa kasi nga di pa siya sure if mapapanindigan niya. Malayo kami sa isa't isa eh. Oooops! Clue drop! Hahaha! Pero naisip ko lang ulit, kung talaga naman na interesado rin siya sa akin, eh di sana noon pa naginitiate na siya ng communication nung andito pa siya. Kaso hindi eh. So mafeeling lang talaga ako? Or dahil nga aalis siya kaya hindi muna siya naginitiate ng communication. Hahahaha. Anuvah talaga?? Kainis!

Pangalawa, if ever man na wala naman talaga siyang interest sa akin, as someone he knows sa facebook lang naman ako sakanya, na kaya hindi siya nagiinitiate kausapin ako is because, meron siyang ibang someone na kinaiinteresan. Aww, that could be sad for me. Hahaha! Sad pero tawa? Baliw!

Pangatlo, baka mahal pa niya ex niya? Hahahahaha! Char!

Pero if ever man ini-stalk din niya ako at nababasa niya 'to, give me a clue naman oh.

Chat ka naman oh. Kahit isang smiley lang. Hehehe. Desperada?? Kapag nagchat ka ng smiley, magrereply din ako ng smiley. Hihihi. Baliw na yata ako! Huhuhu. Sorry.

K, bye.

P.S.: nasa labels ang clue =')

March 15, 2024 - Am I The One Being Manifested?

Just a thought, for the past few weeks, i am manifesting something to happen and little by little i thought it was working. But then i decided to give up, let it go and move on because i just realized that it's none sense and the truth is, it's never gonna happen. I accepted that i was just being delusional, that maybe i am too assuming.

Until lately, now that i finally accepted that yeah i know that it's never gonna work out and i finally don't care anymore, it's starting to show up signs again! Why?? You are frustrating me!! 🤣

But then i realized, that maybe, just maybe, am i the one being manifested? Manipulated? Well, whatever it is that you are doing to me, i think it is working! 🙃

March 14, 2024 - Nakakatampo

One of the advantages of being a private dentist is that you handle your own time at your own free will. If you do not want to do patients for the day, you could just reschedule them. If there's no patient for the day, you could do anything else. You could sleep all day if you want or do something productive like do general cleaning of the house, if medyo sinisipag ka. Cook and vlog, like i use to do, but this day, mej tamad ako. Or do gardening if you love plants.

Now the disadvantage of having a private clinic, with no associates is that, no patient, no income. Sad. That's why we have to have other sources of income. Like investments, or passive income. Hmm. Kailangang magsipag. Marami pa akong travels. Hehe. Pero as of today, i'm so tamad. I have scheduled patient pa this day pero mamaya pa pero i'm so tinatamad talaga. Is it the hormones? Or am i just getting old na? Which is true naman, i accept. 🤣

Okay out of the topic naman tayo. Out of topic pero ilalagay ko as title. 🤣 Nakakatampo. Pero wala naman akong karapatan. Haha. Iniisip ko na lang na, ok baka nga may someone siya kaya hindi ako ineentertain. Delulu momints nanaman ako ngay. Sabi ko pa naman na ayoko na mag-assume. Na maglet go na ako. Marupok amfufu! Maglelet go pero wala namang naumpisahan. Haha. Shyet! Stop! K, bye. 🤣

March, 10 2024 - Post Operative Pain

It saddens me whenever i have to extract a newly restored tooth due to pain. This opposite feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction after restoring a tooth to its natural appearance with biomimetic procedures but still end up aching really breaks my heart.

We dentists sometimes can not do anything if the patient chooses to extract it. Composite restoration is the best we could offer to convince them not to extract the tooth but since it still hurts, we have no other choice.

Root Canal Therapy, especially, would be automatically out of the options since budget would be one of the problems. Though RCT is the best option in treating an acute pain, it's too expensive for most of the patients.

This is probably the main problem where we live in a 3rd world country. Dental health is always sacrificed since basic necessities should be taken care of first. Food and shelter are our priorities. This is sad.

March 9, 2024 - May Gemini

It's 1:25AM to be exact. I could not sleep again cause i took a nap at around 5:30PM till 9PM earlier.

Had 4 patients in the morning till 3:30PM and went out to pay our electric bill and bought what i needed to make a mango sticky rice.

I'm not really sure if i will be able to make that mango sticky rice and vlog it cause later i will be busy again in the clinic.

Okay, random thoughts: I'm finally convinced that one legit traits of a May born Gemini is "madaling magsawa". This day i like you and tomorrow, i don't like you anymore and will never like you ever again. In fact, i could cut you off right now and never regret it.

Once i'm done, i'm done! 🤣

March 6, 2024 - The Whole World Had Stopped

So Facebook was down on March 5, 2024 minutes before 12 midnight. The whole world panicked. That's how facebook is essential to the world nowadays.

Not just facebook is essential, but the whole of the world wide web. Most of the businesses nowadays rely on the internet. I know, we once lived without the internet but now without it? I think just like what happened during the pandemic, our world will stop. But eventually we will recover.

I panicked too, by the way. Who wouldn't? My facebook account was hacked too last year of 2023. No one knows because it's not something to be broadcasted about. Thank God i retrieved it minutes after being hacked. Too risky. I invested too much in that account. Our business' (dental clinic) main admin is me. I can't afford to create new accounts anymore.